back to the rabbit hole
mystery click

angel heart

24 x 36 oil on gallery wrapppped canvas




walk it out

the truth is

this morning

when eye woke up

apart from love

after 2 weeks

tangled in love

  i felt like

i was paradoxically



shockingly alive

all at once

but knew

more than ever before

that as un politically correct

as it sounds

its not just that i want a good woman

so much as that as man

i just plain out need a good woman


on some deeply personal level


terrifies me

annihilates me 

brings me to my knees

for un speak able reasons

that i will now whisper


that is

i fear the loss

of never seeing again

those that i love

after this bag of dust and bones

can no longer walk and talk...

i am not one

able to see a fairy tale heaven 

eye just dont know

what happens after we leave this dream

and that includes

the possibility

of the incomphrehensible


when i woke this morning

i felt all the pain of that un certainty

close again to love

yet also the un fathom able possibility

that at some point

i may

never be able to love that love

let alone touch that love


and in that un reasonable doubt

i pulled myself

out of bed

not claiming to have guts or deep bravery

just saying to myself

all i can do

is love and be loved  


walk it out

as best i can





oily paintings



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if u still wana be on my male list after reading that your prety darn brave


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